Angels which come to pass
She was one of those miracles
which occur every once in a while, every now and then. One of those blessings
which appear all of a sudden out of nowhere. She looked at the world with eyes of a fallen
angel. She still had her wings, but had been lost in the kingdom of us mortals
for such a long time that she actually forgot how to fly… She told me she was a girl slave to the
angels, and that I… I’ve actually made her happy for thousands of years to come.
I promised to her that I’ll protect her from her fears, hide her from the world
of villains, that I’ll forever guard her innocence. Instead of that, I brought
corruption and perversity.
Was my loss of her a causality of
me not recognizing her, or possibly I did recognize her but I couldn’t handle
my actions accordingly? Yet, somehow… in those unscrupulous disturbed
foundations of mine, I know that when I recognized the value of her existence
for me, I just had to lose her!
Time speaks for tales of old,
ancient sins never forgotten in the mists of the past; but then again, time is
a human construct... a common misconception, an unworthy illusion... time is a
fictional concept in which we explain our cyclic behavior!
In loops we find identification,
we get stuck in time:)
And as far as sins go, they’re
only a matter of opinion;)
The loop you create is yours alone. Time is an illusion, like everything else it passes. Does an angel choose to fall or does she believe the lies and promises of the devil's tongue, thus cast into Hell like the rest of the Fallen... Perhaps the angel that you seek still wanders or perhaps she has found solice with the corrupt. One may never know.
ReplyDeleteI think you pulled a chapter from my own diary. Only, you've switched the "he" with a "she." ;) Some of his last words to me were literally that he felt like an angel with broken wings.
ReplyDeleteAnd like your story, even though I feel my connection with him is something that will forever be, and perhaps has always been, I've always felt in the pit of me that we would never "have" one another in the simple constructs of "relationship" developed thus far by mainstream mankind. Two wild horses not daring to interact in any manner which might manipulate or force change upon the other -- appreciating/honoring the beauty of the other's mere existence, each in our own fullness.
Freedom of behaviour and expression (without manipulation or enforcing changes) has always been an integral part of love... and love, it's the only kind of gamble where stake is the soul;)
DeleteMy only experience of what I would deem a real healthy form of LOVE has left me believing that there is no gamble, at all. When I've opened myself to give without concern of what I receive, my heart is only left enlarged. I've only been left feeling more closely in touch with that core part of me that feels at one with ALL. I am left feeling deep gratitude for having encountered another that I could open and share so much of myself. It's in that shared feast of those deepest recesses that I've found I'm able to digest my own inner self.
DeleteSo beautifully described... in there, I see myself;) thank you Audrey!
DeleteA pleasure... :)
ReplyDeleteThe pleasure is mine, for meeting you!
DeleteThen, the feeling is mutual. :)
DeleteMaybe she was your Angel to keep and love and cherish always, in turn let you expierince a love as rare as a natural diamond
ReplyDeleteThe kind of love others can only read about in books from those fortunate enough to actually have lived it and loved it as a blessing straight from God.
yes, she was more than a blessing... at times, love was wasted.
Delete